Blog Layout
Does Money Matter When Dating?
dymond p • September 8, 2020
You should not be dating if you are not financially in that place of your life.
Today, I want to talk about the one thing that is the elephant in the room. I feel like I have the unpopular opinion when it comes to this. Money in relationships. I hate that we have become conditioned to think that it’s either a good guy or a rich guy, why can’t we have both? When you’re younger, money doesn’t matter as much. You don’t care how well the person is taking care of themselves, but as you get older and you’re dating with a purpose to find a lifelong partner, finances are very important. Now if you ignore that, it could harm you in the end. This is why you need to know why you're dating. Once you discover if you’re dating for fun, or for a life partner, your priorities will shift. I’m at a point in my life where I’m not dating just to kick it. I’m the only child and I’m very okay with being alone. I'm dating right now with a purpose to have something grow and blossom into a life long partnership, and husband. I know very much so what I want in a man, and God has his plans on the man that I need, mix those together, perfect combination.
A lot of people say that money doesn’t matter, but it really does. I am in a transitional period where I am trying to elevate every single thing in my life. This means I’m in a growth season. The lifestyle I’m moving into, is more of a high class life. I like the finer things, and I don’t need a guy to have money to take care of me. But I need a man who is equally on that same level as me mentally and financially. I don't need a guy to have money to take care of me, but can you take care of yourself. I love taking trips, nice dinners, and trying new things. If I’m dating a person who isn’t there financially, I would have to either let go of that life, or pay for “US” to do those things. Both of which I’m not doing. Some people want to leach on to their partner and that isn’t healthy. Even if you’re dating someone who doesn’t have the same financials as you, they need to have the ambition and drive to want more. I’m far from where I want to be! I'm not saying I want a rich guy, but it's the mindset. I have the hustle and work ethic to go after everything I want. When dating, I have to date someone who is equally like that. Also, I don’t know about you but I love to be courted when dating. If you’re struggling financially, you won’t be able to fully do that.
On top of that, I’m on a feminine journey. Everybody, no matter if your male or female, can exude masculine and feminine energy. It’s not gender specific. Certain things will cause a person to exude one more than the other. The person who pays more will exude more masculine, dominant, energy. It happens naturally. I’ve occupied that space in the past and I don’t like that for me. It makes me more aggressive and ultimately brings out the worse in me. In past relationships, I had more than the guy. So I would take care of a lot of relationship money things. Like paying for dates, spending more on trips, and ultimately having the "head of household'' mindset. So I know moving forward I don’t want to occupy that space when I’m getting serious with someone. Some women thrive having that role in a relationship, I'm one who doesn't. I have to be aggressive and masculine in business, so when I'm with my man I don't want to have to be that way.
You have to know yourself when dating. Money is important when you’re getting serious with someone. Along with money, you need to date someone who is equally ambitious and goal oriented. Don’t let society make you think you’re wrong for wanting to date someone who is financially at a certain place. Money isn’t everything but it’s certainly something. Discover what that looks like for you and don't settle.
